Local church offering program to help people going through a divorce

 

 

By Ron Giofu

 

Those going through a divorce can soon turn to a local church for assistance.

Lighthouse Church will be offering a program known as “Divorce Care” and it is a support group that originated in North Carolina in the early 1990’s and has now grown internationally. It is run by Pastor Adrian Ninaber and his wife Rose Ninaber and will run every Wednesday night starting Sept. 20.

“It’s a 13-week program,” explained Rose. “It’s geared towards those who are divorced or separated.”

Rose added that the program assists people who suddenly find themselves facing the end of their marriage and compared the feelings to someone who goes to a town that has been hit by a tornado.

“That’s kind of what divorce does to your life,” she said. “It’s like a tornado hitting you.”

The program allows people to plot a course on where they go from there, including guiding people through their anger, depression and loneliness. There are also seminars on how it affects children and a person’s finances. While a marriage might not be able to be fixed, there are also ways to forgive and reconcile as the two people in the estranged marriage could still see each other for a long time afterward.

“It’s a co-ed program,” said Adrian. “We have strict rules – no dating. If you are looking to date, sayonara.”

Most people don’t approach the Divorce Care group as an opportunity to meet someone new, he added, as it is designed to help people through what they are experiencing in a divorce.

Both Rose and Adrian agree that it is nice that it is a co-ed program, as women and men get to see what both sides experience.

“It gives an appreciation of what the other gender is going through,” said Adrian.

There are confidentiality agreements so that people can come in and open up about what they are feeling and be assured it won’t be spread outside the group.

“We want to keep the confidentiality so they can come and share,” said Rose.

Rose and Pastor Adrian Ninaber of Lighthouse Baptist Church will be conducting a Divorce Care program every Wednesday night for 13 weeks. The program starts Sept. 20.

Rose and Pastor Adrian Ninaber of Lighthouse Baptist Church will be conducting a Divorce Care program every Wednesday night for 13 weeks. The program starts Sept. 20.

The sessions run each Wednesday evening from 7-8:30 p.m. with three 30-minute segments. Rose said people often start out such groups as strangers but end up as friends. There is a cost of $20, with that covering the workbook each person receives and gets to keep. Class sizes average about eight to ten people and Rose said people can step in at any time, even if they have missed a few weeks.

“I went through a divorce in 1998 and I took this course,” Rose stated. “That’s why I’m so passionate about it. It helped me a great deal. There is life after divorce.”

Adrian said it is often recommended that people don’t immediately go into another relationship right after their marriage ends as they could bring “baggage” into a new relationship.

“Don’t jump into another relationship without processing everything that’s happened to you,” said Adrian. “They need to work through the process of grieving and hurt until they are whole again.”

Divorce Care is a network of over 15,000 churches worldwide equipped to house divorce support groups. The program is non-denominational and is described as featuring practical information and biblical teaching for recovering from divorce or separation.

For more information, contact 519-962-9525 or visit www.divorcecare.org. Lighthouse Church is located at 266 King St., at the corner of Gore St.

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